The people who saw me in my worst moments and showed no support nor understanding. The people who decided they didn’t want to put the effort into the relationship between me and them, choosing to walk away. The people who just left without word nor any given reason, while I was left standing there, hurt because I cared.
These are my ghosts. These are my scars. These are my memories that may leave me feeling insecure and unable to trust easily.
I say ‘may’ because though these past experiences continue to haunt me, I’ve been working on decreasing their effects. It’s been a difficult inner struggle, partially because when I began trying to improve myself in this regard, the lack of trust had already been rooted in me for awhile. As well, there was the fact that as I struggled with those whom in my past had ‘left’, people in my current life gave me that vibe as well.
These are ghosts I’m still fighting to banish. In the last while, I haven’t felt or thought about them and happened to think I’d successfully gotten rid of them. Alas, last night, they returned. Hence, I know I’ve still got some work to do – and that’s okay.
It’s alright because I’ve gotten this far and I know I can continue to work on moving past these ghosts. I’m working toward the future, not looking behind at the past – and that’s one of the first steps one can take.
I don’t know what haunts you. Maybe it’s a similar trial you face, where trust is difficult to give because people have let you down. Maybe it’s something completely different. It doesn’t necessarily have to be people that haunt you – it could be events, words, anything. However, know that you can move on and forward from it. You have the strength and ability to do those things.
Here are some tips on what has help me in my fight with the ghosts:
By Janice Lam, @lamjylam
Do you have any other strategies for how to move past your ghosts? Comment below!